Successful Friendships

II'm very happy to have the privilege of having friends.  Although I don't communicate with most of my friends daily or weekly for that matter - I feel like God has blessed me with a great gift in having people to call on when I'm in need, or run to when I'm in pain, . . . , people who love me will lovingly ,honestly, and candidly check me when I'm veering away from sound or ethical actions, and especially people who will listen to me intently when I need to vent.  I believe that part of being a genuine success in life is having true friends

Yesterday evening I watched a tear jerker movie that reminded me of one such friend.  I have not been in communication with her for more than a decade (other than the annual Christmas Cards that we exchange.  The thing that stands out in my mind most about this dear lady is that she was someone I really needed at that time but I couldn't see it then.  I was still trying to deal with a very difficult situation I was privately enduring in my life.  She asked me a question one day that hit a nerve - then the flood gates opened. 

This sweet lady listened to me without interruption (other the superfluous noises she occasionally made to let me know that she was still listening).  About two hours later I was finished.  The next day she called me and apologized that she had to get off of the phone the day before and wanted to know if I had said everything that I needed to say.  After a few moments of polite conversation - she hit another nerve and I went off on another verbal tangent.  This went on for nearly a month. 

By this time she had shared similar situations that she had endured and how she was able to over come them.  I had also discovered that she had not only been through some similar challenges in life; but that she was a jewel of a woman in spite of being reared by an unsavory street woman.  She had actually endured much more in life than me, but she became a jewel of a woman through her will and persistent effort.  One day when we were talking about a situation that was particularly difficult for me to over come I felt (for lack of a better term) free.  I was no longer hurthing.  I didn't burst into tears.  That situation no longer had a hold on my heart, my emotions, or my mind.  Then I started laughing and told her - I'm free.  I'm not hurting any more.  We, of course, began to Thank God in unison.

I'm writing about this particular incident because the part of the movie that I saw last night that broke my heart was the part where one lady was telling/ ordering her "friend" how to think, what to do, how to feel in her turmoil.  The hurting friend reluctantly went alont with the pushy friends advice in spite of what she felt was the best course of action for her.  I'm writing to encourage every one who reads this blog to practice listening to your friends.  Just be there - without judgment, without criticisms, and without imposing obligations on your "friend" to act or react . . . in so doing your friend will come back to you and open up to you more and more; your life may be positively impacted in return.

Andrea